भीड़ (Crowd)

भीड़ क्या होती हैं?

ज्यादातर भीड़ प्रायोजित होती है। स्वस्फूर्त भीड़ तो बहुत ही कम होती है। भीड़ का अपना कोई दिमाग नहीं होता इस कारण इसे शातिर लोग जैसा चाहे हांकते है। सामान्य मनुष्य तो भीड़ के पीछे का हेतु समझ ही नहीं पाता। भीड़ के प्राण सामूहिक भावों में बसते है। जब तक इन भावों को भीड़ की मानसिकता में बसाए रखा जाता है भीड़ बिखरती नहीं।

भीड़ के ५ प्रकार

भीड़ कई प्रकार की होती है पर मुख्य रूप से निम्न प्रकार की प्रचलन में है :

1. धार्मिक समूहों की भीड़

2. राजनीतिक फायदे वाली भीड़

3. सामाजिक कार्यक्रम वाली भीड़

4. मनोरंजन वाली भीड़
5. अकस्मात घटनाओं से प्रेरित भीड़

इसके अलावा कुछ भीड़ उपरोक्त में से दो या तीन प्रकार की एक साथ भी हो सकती है। भीड़ के मनोविज्ञान कोआज के युग में समझना बहुत जरूरी हो गया है। भीड़ के माध्यम से न जाने क्या क्या काम हो जाते है। हर भीड़ के बड़े बड़े प्रायोजक बहुत बड़े बड़े बजट ले कर काम करते है। इस भीड़ के द्वारा कोई अपना कद या प्रभाव दिखा पाता है तो कोई अपनी पहुंच। भारत जैसे देश में तो बहुत से व्यक्तियों के लिए ये रोजगार बन चुकी है।

अब मुद्दे की बात है कि में भीड़ के बारे में इतना क्यों लिख रहा हूं। जब अनपढ़ लोगों के साथ साथ बुद्धिजीवी भी भीड़ की मानसिकता में जीने की राह खोजने की चेष्टा करते है तो बहुत दुख होता है। किसी विचार की मौलिकता परखे बिना आंख बंद करके किसी का अनुसरण करना बहुत दुर्भाग्यपूर्ण है। शायद इसी अवस्था में लोगों को देख कर मुझे इस पर लिखने का विचार आया। कोई कुछ भी कह दे या कोई घटना होती है तो इसके पीछे छुपे हुए हेतु को समझना चाहिए। तुरंत प्रतिक्रिया और भीड़ इकठ्ठा कर लेना शायद किसी और का मकसद हो और आप अनजाने में ही इसका शिकार हो रहे हो इसका ध्यान रखना चाहिए।

भीड़ के बारे में सावधानी बरतिए

आपको जीवन के हर मोड़ पर भीड़ इकट्ठा करने वाले लोगों से सावधान रहना होगा। भीड़ से माहौल दिखता है पर रचनात्मकता भीड़ से नहीं आ सकती। आपको भीड़ में सब साथ में दिखाई देंगे पर अकेले में आपकी मुसीबत में ये भीड़ कभी साथ नहीं देगी। भूलकर भी भीड़ पर मत इतराना नहीं तो सच्चाई से सामना करना मुश्किल हो जाएगा। भीड़ जब छट जाती है तो वहीं माहौल सूनेपन में तब्दील हो जाता है।

थोड़ा और इस विषय को रोचक बनाए तो भीड़ को दो और पहलू पर विचार करना होगा। कुछ भीड़ सुखप्रेरित होती है तो कुछ दुख प्रेरित। सुख प्रेरित भीड़ में सपने दिखाएं जाते है और दुख प्रेरित भीड़ में दुख की पीड़ा दिखा कर सहानुभूति की खेती की जाती है। दोनों ही भीड़ के प्रायोजकों की भरमार है बस आप उन्हें देख नहीं पाते।

आशा है आपको भीड़ के मनोविज्ञान पर मेरे विचार पसंद आए होंगे। आपके सुझावों का मुझे इंतज़ार रहेगा।

धन्यवाद। अशोक मादरेचा

What Governs Your Life ?

Life is available in limited time slots and we spend it with our own chosen path. It is very important for us to know what really governs our life. We grow with different priorities at different time but sometime we stay stuck up with a type of static mentality or set of mind and it starts governing our life either positively or negatively. There are permutations or combinations of what really governs us. Prominently these are the points which governs or controls us knowingly or unknowingly :

1. A person or group of people : As a member of society we all stay in touch with variety of people. These people are from our relatives, mentors, friends and so on. Everybody from these affects us and we exchange multiple inputs from each other in our behavior. More we depend upon other people more we allow them to govern our life and choice is ours only.

    

2. Mission : Many of us have some mission for life. Accomplishing a mission demands deep devotion and it governs all our activities for that period. A mission completed in time or remained uncompleted for long affects tremendously. 

3. Location and Atmosphere : We stay, live at a particular place and the atmosphere around us makes a lot of difference. When we are exposed to very polluted atmosphere and simultaneously deprived of basic amenities, we become totally different from people who are grown up in a pollution free zone and had all comforts of life.

4. Thoughts and perceptions : The main cause which affects our life most is the thoughts and perceptions we develop. Our thoughts, perceptions , fears, positiveness, and negativeness makes us a different person. Over a time we draw lines of different colors in our life and live it with consciously or unconsciously. 

5. Comfort zone : In our life , we all have our own comfort zones in different fields. If any force comes to disturb it, we resist it. We dislike changes and even if there are  forceful changes, we would like them to happen within our comfort zones only and this way it governs our life.

6  Uncertainty : There is uncertainty all around and it affects us depending upon level of our resistance. Those who can not understand it are vulnerable to indecisiveness and their life is more governed by uncertainty.

7. Object, things : many of us like and dislike things or objects of different kind. one may like a particular car or other one may like to have a beautiful house at riverside and so on. If our views are object centric than we would be more governed by availability or unavailability of such things or objects.

8. Position, Power, Wealth : Position, power and wealth in life too governs many of us. We notice many time that if money is available, than power will be most sought  and if the powerful position is available than wealth becomes most sought after. 

9. Health : Health governs almost everyone in one way or another. If it is good, life is better and if the health is not good than everything in life seems not well. Even health of a family member or close friend too affects us very prominently 

Mute point is to know not only what affects us, it is also important that if something affects or governs us, do we know at what level it is rational. If it has become part and parcel of our routine, then we must reassess and find out , is it really that much important which governs us or we must come out of that and change for better.  

The above analysis is not solving problems we face in general, but it is just trying to have more clarity about the life. It may offer some clue about the right direction which is missing sometime for long. A well thought life finds its purpose and becomes more meaningful if we review from time to time that what really governs us. 

Religion or Rituals

Have a look at history, we can notice, one of the most prominent reason for massive violence world over is wrong interpretation of religion while the basic purpose for all religion is peace and liberation. Why so much contradiction ? What can be the reason ? Very simple, most of us follow rituals and not the religion in its true sense. Accomplishing a ritual is far different then following true spirit of a religion. This is the point where we start differing with other religious followers and eventually it leads to hate and sometime big wars too. This situation is like a camera which captures beautiful images but having no feature of viewing these images and still the owner feels proud of it. Going and attending particular prayer or any other ritual may add to our religious profile but simultaneously denying others right and faith will lead to unrest only.

Important part of any achievement are "work and efforts" then why religious rituals comes on front in our life and there we as an human being have to remain very vigilant and see whether it is really religion or mere ritual. Sometime rituals and religions, both these words are used as interchangeable which makes the situation more complex and confusing and it haunts our outer and inner progress considerably. As an individual too , many time one starts mere following ritual and after passage of sometime if the results are not as per expectations, one may doubt the very religion itself which he never understood so far. Moreover rituals too are defined or evolved as per convenience of situation, location, or as per wishes of some individuals who are good orators but not actual religious one, then one has to be very rational in deciding the truth and adopting it in his or her life.....

सच्चाई

ख़ुशी की खोज बाहर करना
फिर पुरानी गलती दोहराना
सुख शांति के दो पल पाने की
अभिलाषा बस कुछ कर जाने की
कोशिश करना व्यर्थ नहीं होता
प्रयत्नों से कौन समर्थ नहीं होता
ले नहीं पाते जिंदगी उतना देती हे
ज़माने का दोष नहीं, कर्मो की खेती हे
कई बार साफ़ दिखता भी हे
पर समझ कम पड़ जाती हे
दिग्भ्रमित से मंजिलो की तलाश में
कुछ मिलेगा हर वक़्त इसी आस में
स्वयं की व्यवस्था में लगे दिन रात
झूठ के सहारे करते रहे हर बात।
जब सच्चाई सामने प्रकट होगी
स्थिति स्वयं बड़ी विकट होगी
दर्पण से सामना नहीं कर पाओगे
अपना चेहरा खुद ही छुपाओगे
समय को कौन रोक पाता हे
ये तो बस बीतता जाता हे
ये तो बस बीतता जाता हे.…।

Express Completely

Life provides us opportunities to express ourselves on varied fronts, be it social, academic, carrier wise, public forums or at personal level. Many of us not even recognise these opportunities and defer our decision to work on that and this all leads us to live without effectiveness. We as human being are most intellectual creature of the nature but our intelligence if not used properly can work against our own. 

Some questions we may ask to ourselves :

What debars us expressing completely in our deeds ?

Why hesitation takes prime place while working?

Why we do not create a sound image of ourselves?

Do we perform half heartedly?

Are we really interested in what we are doing ?

Do the outcome inspire us to  work towards it?

Is it a person , location or situation compelling to work ?

Are we so much compelled that we can not make the change we imagined ?

If we can find honest answers of all these questions from ourselves , a kind of clarity we can have towards the life we really wish to live.

whatever we do, barring very few exception of diplomacy , express yourself completely to the extent you can and it will culminate into a big success even you did not sought sometime. half way expressing brings monotony in life , be it job, carrier, education, society or even loving someone.

You Knew It ... Still...

 

1. We can not make everyone happy at a time :To become decisive,we must accept the fact that everyone wont be happy by your actions and we should be ready for that. Your boss may be happy but your subordinates may not, your parents would be happy but spouse may not .

2. Changes are inevitable : to lead a balanced life we should be well aware of that everything changes except the change itself.  I agree , you have read it many times , you know it but while behaving with one or more we forget it and put ourselves in trouble repeatedly. We take something so seriously as if without it sky would fall and our actions start finding wrong directions.

3. Be pragmatic, not dogmatic. : world over most of the successful people's history shows that they were pragmatic and this led them to more acceptance and thereby more success too. Here one should differentiate flexibility and compromise well as per time and situation. Being practical in our approach is very useful in business too.

4. More we are selfish, more unhappiness. :simple rule to happiness is to remain selfless and unattached as much possible as we can. Tonnes of research paper one may find on attaining happiness, I would like to summarize and state that living for self only is not life one should always strive to be good and useful to others too and this will first big step to happiness.  

5. Understand well what governs our life , money, name or something else : if we can understand what really we need at particular stage of life then our efforts would not make us tired early. I would like to mention here that it is better to allow qualities to govern your life instead of a particular person.

6. Measure your freedom from time to time : everyone likes freedom. may be it is financial, social or else. As life advances we should have clarity about it. are we serious about it or just passing time. freedom itself is a big source of happiness.

7. Relate every decision with the time factor: deciding something requires input of time factor. Every decision has to be taken after considering time factor. for example, Mr. John is curious about investing in good home at his native place which is very far from his working place. He thinks he would be staying there for 10 days in a year. This decision should be taken in light of the time factor. What is the age of Mr. John, How healthy he is to commute ?
whether he would be able to maintain the house without going there. This is mere an example to take right decision.

8. If health is wealth then why one should ignore it: commonly it is said that health is wealth but in our routine life we commonly ignore it too. Paying attention and sparing adequate time for health is must and there is no other option to this. adequate exercise, meditation, proper diet pattern has to be followed religiously.

9. Relationship is not just planting a tree , it requires water regularly: all relations are like plants and these requires water at regular intervals. Mostly we find that initially lot of enthusiasm is shown in any new relationship and after sometime maintaining it takes back seat resulting into break ups. Wise   people understands it and keep their relationship live and vibrant.

10. Confusion creates cowards so be sure about yourself: in my seminar, many time I find people are suffering just because they are confused.I suggest here we should always break questions and try to resolve them. Our approach of getting all answers at a time makes confusion more strong. a separate write up on confusion is written on this blog in article section.
    
11. Destiny , religion may be good to understand but taking efforts in right direction is must to achieve something: considerable part of time is spent on discussing what is destiny , where is god, What is religion etc. I would put it this way being spiritual is good but different than what is discussed academically. As an individual our thought process and actions should be focused on what is to be achieved specifically.
 
12. Accept good and bad both: We are happy if we are comfortable. This is human nature that we accept goodness, comfort, love, favor, service, different kind of gadgets but we don't like discomforts , orders, hate, etc. Point here is that everything carries good and bad elements both. If a person loves someone and hates his or her voice , can this work for long ? We have to accept bad and good both simultaneously more particularly in relationship.
     
13. If you don't have good relation with your neighbors, relatives, friends, family members simultaneously then introspect in deep: If you are facing such situation then something is wrong within you and it requires introspection. Just have a second thought about yourself and see what can be changed at your end first.

14. Never say anyone that you are wrong instead make them feel they are wrong if required. But this should not be the aim of life as it consumes lot of energy. Giving space is better than proving someone wrong.

15. Respect and love can not be attained by demanding : it is funny when we come across people seeking respect and love just by demanding. These people are desperate and feel like this is their right and all this leads them to no where.  life is an art of living where love blossoms and respect too showers on deserving and this can not be attained by demanding.

16. Take small steps first before you leap: any mission or goal can be accomplished on sound footing and for that one need to take small steps first. Any plan, team, resources and networking etc. requires grip on minute details hence taking leap is always advised after some small crucial steps.

17. Develop niche in some areas of your choice to make yourself valuable: Many people come with complaints of being not valued, not paid adequately in their job or else. I simply ask them do they update their knowledge  ? Do they have niche in some area where they can become unique or outstanding? if not then strive for this and these complaints will go away.  

18. Peace is the answer not the enmity: never say anybody enemy. Hostility destroys peace and without peace progress can not be achieved. Even due to some event or otherwise somebody is hostile try to overcome such hostility. Some liberal postures and actions can change whole life. I know well many diplomats would not agree to me.

19. Be Simple : living in your true being is relaxing so be simple. Complex life is very stressful. Even if you are wealthy, top achiever in any field , be polite , smiling .... may be you are a great leader of near future !  
   
20. Even after following all the above if you feel things are not as per your expectation , take pause, relax, life teaches you for better role and of course time too changes so don't worry at all, have courage .

Life may seems to be  battles
there are roses and patels
both are there cold and heat
heart is soft keep clean and neat
you may be fathers or mothers too
be happy and keep happy others too..

This article is written after deep study on many cases from different perspective. I wish every word of this write up will be useful not only to an individual but to organizations, societies, or even countries too. I personally dedicate this write up to entire humanity and those counselors who are putting serious efforts to bring happiness in others life selflessly. I appeal all my readers to share this article for spreading knowledge about living life in harmony .... thanks.. 

                                                                                   Ashok Madrecha 

सत्य (Truth)

कितने पड़ाव पार कर इस यात्रा मे
क्यू आज फ़िर से अकेले खड़े …।
शायद बहुत कमाई धन दौलत
और नाम से भी हो गये बड़े …।
तलाशती आँखे अपनों को जो
इस दौड़ मे कब के बिछुड़े… ।
रिश्तों के पौधों को पानी ना पिलाया
पत्ते सूखे , डाली सूखी , सूख गइ झड़े…।
झूठी दीवारों को घर का नाम दिया
और आपाधापी मे , सबसे रिश्ते बिग़डे …।
अहंकार ने बदल दी , सारी परिभाषाएं
आकंठ दुखी होकर भी इतना अड़े …।
करुणा और मैत्री के रंग दिखते नहीं
हे मनुज तुम किस चक्कर मे पड़े …।
उलझने बढ़ती गई जीवन की राह मे
कहो मित्र ! तुम बड़े या तुम्हारे सपने बड़े …।
किस पर विजय पताका फ़हरानी हे जो
तुम हर पल , हर दम सबसे लड़े ……।
__________    अशोक मादरेचा
 This poem is true feeling of a person for his close friend who has created lot of wealth but lost all his balance of life and now he is out of reach for him.

How to Overcome confusion

This article is written with focus on creating work life balance , making decision making process smooth and thereby improving life overall.

How to Overcome confusion

Striking balance in life essentially requires anyone to stay in focus, come out of doubt and to be more specific, overcoming all confusion which hinders progress. I would like to divide this whole chapter of confusion in four parts:
1) What is confusion - Understand it well
2) What level it is affecting / governing our life
3) Tips to overcome confusion
4) Benefits of overcoming confusion

1) What is confusion - Understand it well : in simple words we can say any indecisiveness is confusion. Yes,true, but I would put it this way , first you can call a situation which is dilemma and other is real confusion. While in dilemma one is not sure of choosing one out of two options available, confusion is far wider subject and one can have different options to overcome it depending upon one's resources, ability and efforts etc. for that.Confusion is a state of mind due to some internal or external reasons and it haunts mind and consumes lot of energy too , of course.

2) What level it is affecting / governing our life: Now let us understand the level of confusion which is governing our life.
There are some interesting people and even corporates.they face confusion and start working on that very systemically, chase this and find solution and sometime business opportunity too. This I would say Level 1 of confusion.
There are some different sort of people who are confusedbut just for time being. they are alert and seek help of others and overcome confusion. this is level 2 of confusion.
There are people who have developed tendency to remain confused unknowingly and their whole behavior, style of living too is constantly affected. They are so much engrossed by such situation that they always live in unknown fear, uncertainty and many of them have gone to level of depression too. this I would say Level 3 of confusion.

3) Tips to Overcome Confusion : 
a) Analise how relevant is this to you.If the confusion itself is not relevant to you why you are confused?
b) Try yourself to find answer first
c) If not possible, seek help of your network which may be from your mentors,parents,friends, relatives.
d) Make use of other sources like internet, search engines, books and other reference materials
    available   to you.
e) Note all your options and ask yourself what can be best and what will be the worst if you take some
    decision to overcome confusion.
f) Count your blessings, take honest efforts and leave the result up to destiny.
g) After applying all the above if you are fearless then mind well, this confidence itself will take you out
    from the confusion.

4) Benefits of Overcoming Confusion : 
Once we overcome confusion positive vibes starts flowing and the benefits too. some of the major benefits are as under:
a) Life begin full of confidence and I repeat , it essentially heals all wounds which were hindering the path of progress.
b) One gets focused and a person of conviction with some aims to achieve.
c) Goals are well defined and they start taking shape in real terms.
d) People start respecting you as you are not called so confused one.
e) Wealth is attracted may be through carrier, job,business or practice you pursue.
f) There are many benefits but in short and at Last I would say it makes you totally different, a most sought person in your circle.

All the best. 

तलाश (Search)

मन की थाह पाना मुश्किल है पर
यह कोशिश ख़ुशी देती है
कुछ पहेलियाँ ना सुलझे तो भी
नये अनुभव तो देती हे........ ।
झील सी गहरी आँखों में तैरते प्रश्न
और उत्तर खोजने की जिज्ञाषा
शांत वातायन में बहुत बड़े
तूफ़ान का इशारा देती हे.…… ।
मुद्दत से खोजने की आरजू थी
रुबरु होकर आज बतियाने की बारी
क्यों मौन रहने का सन्देश देती हे
एकांत नहीं थी जिंदगी कभी
सुहाने सफ़र में भी , नीरवता में भी
उनिन्दो की नींद उड़ा देती हे.…।
अनूठे फूलो की सुंदरता
टहनी पे स्वाभाविक हे पर
खुशबु की मादकता अब
झूमने की चाहत देती हे
लबो से बोल नहीं निकलते
और आँखों की भाषा चुपचाप
कितना कुछ कह देती है...........।

This poem in Hindi states about state of mind where feeling and expression try to find their place in any relationship but words become unable to do so and the poem goes on......
 

सत्य के समीप

सत्य के समीप

कही मौन भाषा हे कही पे वक्तत्व .
ख़ुशी खोजने का उप्क्रुम सभी करते निरंतर
ता जिन्दगी उल्जन हे सत्य और असत्य का अंतर .
यही उल्जन आदत सी बन गयी कमोबेश सबकी ,
बचपन बिता तबसे ये परेशानी हे सबकी .
भटकती भीड़ के जुंड में अपना अस्तित्व क्या हे
और गर कोई जान भी गया तो भीड़ का हेतु क्या हे ?
कुछ तो मिलेगा ? ये कब तक चलेगा ?
क्या जींदगी यही हे या कुछ सार भी निकलेगा ?
रोज नए बहाने बनाकर हम सहज महसूस करते हे ,
जानकर अनजान हे , नाजुक हरदय को क्यों मायूस करते हे .
खुद से साक्षात्कार करे बिना हम अधूरे हे हरदम
खुशिया दो खुशिया मिलेगी यही हो अब अगला कदम .

Greed and Fear both haunt us constantly..

Seriously we are continuously governed by our own greed and fear. Every aspect of our life be it social, economic, spiritual, relationship, job carrier or whatever we can think of  are affected and decided by our own level of greed and fear. Some time we create comfort by calling it destiny or otherwise.If we really analyze about how much energy we are spending with these two things, greed and fear, we would be surprised that almost whole life we spending our time remaining with these two close companions and funny thing is that we are totally loyal to these two elements without knowing how these are playing with or affecting us to what level and thus creating havoc in our life.

World over great achievers knew their limits and they created good balance and converted these two elements to their source of power in performing well in the area they conquered.

 

Thinking Beyond But In Presence Of Greed and Fear

Common behavior is always affected by greed and fear while uncommon people or great person think beyond but in presence of greed and fear. They already know the effects, results, outcomes be it favorable or unfavorable. "Thinking in presence" and "Thinking  after having effect of greed and fear" both are totally different and it requires serious observation.

Many economies run by central bank's actions which affects interest rates, inflation, liquidity etc. I would say these are other names of greed and fear calculated in monetary terms which we can see in the behavior of stock markets too.

In political fields, leaders try to manage countries by use of these two elements to their advantages. They create and sell dreams. They create fear and show imaginary solutions too. Those who are smart enough , they win the confidence of the voters and enjoy the fruits of thinking in presence of greed and fear.

Social or religious leaders too found using these tools to make their agenda moving ahead. They try to impress their followers with certain belief and thus make them fearful and simultaneously they present themselves as if they are only who are having all the solutions in their hand , sometime they go to the extent claiming superpowers within them ........ all funny .. because of the reason , already indicated earlier ......  "Common people are not thinking independently "  .

What should we learn is that " Life itself is a golden opportunity blessed to us " , why we can not think beyond greed and fear ? If can not, at least we "think in presence of greed and fear".

Perception and Thought Process

Generally our thoughts are governed by our perception. We complain why we are not achieving upto our expectation. There may be many factors responsible for achieving less and among theses I feel Perception too plays vital role affecting our thinking process and obviously execution level finally.

I would like to mention an example here, One of my Client who was always busy in finding good business opportunities and i would say to a great extent he was successful also in his business adventures most of the time . One fine day he came to my chamber and while in informal talk with me he asked few questions


Why I dont feel good about life ?
Why there is a feeling of being lonely ?
Why all my achievements are not enough to make me happy ?

First I congratulated him for asking such questions then he was surprised what for I was greeting him. I replied .. Dear .. you are my client since last 25 years and I never had such nice questions from your side . You always came to my office for some work and despite our 25 years relationship never asked about your health or my health or else...  I congratulate to you for starting of real thought process. He was still confused .. Sir I want to transform but how I really dont know ?  I knew he was very much selfish and never been supporting others...

I replied can you ask me what  the age of human being in our country ... he told 65 .. ok I said and asked what is your age he said 56 ... I asked him to reduce his age from the average age and he answered .. Its 9 years only.  While replying my last question I could see his face and expression full of introspection. He cried, astonished and told me Sir I never thought this way.. Life is now remaining only for 9 years more .. I got less time to lots of thing for others too.. He is completely a changed man today.. Just by changing Percetion.

Decision

Its funny .. we wait for our best time to come and postpone important decision for future .. Just be with the present and at least take calculated risk to move ahead..